Doing Right Continued…

So after God told me what I needed to do, I discussed it with my husband (my then boyfriend) who tried to convince me that living in sin had nothing to do with our situation and that God would bless anyway. When I wasn’t convinced, he agreed to the celibate part – I think just to get me to stop talking about it, as it became apparent later on that he didn’t think that I was serious. Not sleeping together after already having a child together and forcing him to make a decision regarding his marriage was hard on both of us. Anyone that I told (and there were very few) that we were going to be celibate, had the same reaction – but you already have a kid together.. you have already slept together so why stop now? And my response was, if you steal it doesn’t mean that you have to continue stealing because you are already screwed and its too late to change anything. You can stop sinning anytime you want and do the right thing, no matter what you have already done. My husband took the seriousness of my actions the hardest. After all, it put the ball in his court. If he wanted to stay with me and together as a family, then he had to get it together and file for divorce no matter how difficult it was going to be. Or, he could leave and find someone else to give him the milk for free (cheesy analogy, but it’s true.. he didn’t buy the cow until I stopped giving him the milk for free.) I stood firm in what God had told me to do even though people tried to convince me that God didn’t care that he was married on paper when he wasn’t in his heart. I stood fast to my decision and it put a terrible strain on our relationship and family. I was miserable and resentful and angry. I offered no affection whatsoever, only bitterness. And not getting the attention he was used to, he sought it elsewhere. It was a really rough time.
It would have been easier to give in to lust and desire and not do Gods will, but I wanted to be blessed. I wanted to please God. And so I held fast to my decision, even when things came to a head and exploded in an emotional mess around February 14, 2012. But, when the smoke cleared, guess what? He was divorced.. He had lost all of my trust and I had to decide if I even wanted to be with him anymore, but he was finally divorced. After that, slowly but surely, things started to get better. I got a good job that still allows me to be a Mom and he started to get steady work and found a really good deal on a truck. We were able to find another place to live and it was such a burden off of our shoulders to be out of the house and neighborhood we were in. Things are still going great and every day they get better. Why? Because we are living our lives better, in a way that is more pleasing to God. We got married in 2012. We give Him the Glory, and not other things or people.
I shared this story because I want you (anyone that happens to read this) that I know from my own experience that following the will of God is not always easy. It takes effort and sacrifice and it means not putting yourself and your agenda first. You have to surrender those things. But the rewards far outweigh the struggle. To be in God’s favor and be truly blessed is how you can start to feel some small bit of peace in your life.
That is all for this topic for now… until I am directed to write on another topic. Be blessed!

About Amy

Hello! I am 33 years old, a wife (just recently in 2012) and a mother (that came first in 2009). I used to be fairly laid back, but having a kid really upped my sensitivty which was heightened already. I really believe in saying how I feel, when I feel it. I express my feelings – alot – maybe too much…but I feel that it lets everyone know where I stand so that there is no confusion. And, I would like the same in return – but… good luck with that!

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